u noe?! all my efforts gone down to waste. aft all de efforts and hardwork put in to slim dwn for the past half yr, came bac in a mth's time. saddening. it feels so depressing. i dunno wat i can do to make up for all de time lost and the gain in weight.
my passport haf to b renew and i nid to haf passport size photos to b taken. but... i haven even take de pic cos i m scared tt i will look ugly in de pics.
im depressed... yea.
i ate alot todae. i tink i shld ... arghz!!! ate roti prata in at home. den a muffin and a few pcs of new year cookies before work. had mee soto and fried chicken wing for lunch todae. kip eating de cookies bac in office. now, im bac home and ate half a bowl of rice wif half a cream puff and 1 muffin. omg! i m gainin n i've gain weight!
gonna exercise soon. 9-9:30pm. if nt, i will jus look lik pig. man! pls dun let me look lik a pig!
i'm scared, i'm scared, i'm scared.
countdown to my bdae: 19 daes.
too stress to even countdown to my dae... nt in de mood to celebrate or anitink. :x
i regretted eating de fried chicken wing todae. n my tummy feels... weird.
0oh man! i reali feel lik cryin nw.
我.爱.水.母.头
20:43 |
Sunday, December 28, 2008
went to dunno-which-relative's wedding ceremony at church ytd noon. bethesda church at depot road. tt explains the pic below. isnt de snowman and reindeer cute? perhaps nt so nice in pic. but wen u actually c it urself, they are super cute. :) de ceremony was norm. my first time seeing a christian wedding.. isit? i oso dunno. haha. i enjoy the process. :) n we took grp foto. too large a grp i shld sae. wore hills de whole dae. til my legs hurts. muaha. de whole ceremony is abt 1 hr 15 mins. kinda fast. n tea reception!!! muaha. de food are okie i shld sae. i ate quite alot though im full. had abt 6-8 pcs of sushi, 14 breaded prawn, 3 pcs of oatmeal fish, 2 breaded scallop, 6-7 pcs of curry chic, 4 cups of orange squash, half a plate of hong kong noodles n.. i tink tt's all. *burp* de curry chicken is nice, breaded prawn is nice, but the fish is nt. muaha. n dere's fried rice and vege i didnt eat. wen walking ard de depot shopping ctr? for awhile n went vivo. finally drank my strawberry yoghurt ice blended wif pearl, saw de dogs and... nth else. seems lik everytime i go vivo, i cant finish walkin the whole place. looking forward to de dae wen i can realli unwind... :)
isnt de deco cute? love the reindeer and snowman.
yea. de stupid me fell aft takin dis pic. thanks to my heels. haha.
c my poor tink bear. he is drowning!!! HAPPIE!!!(tt's his name.)
我.爱.水.母.头
12:11 |
Saturday, December 27, 2008
cousin came. so i actually visit dem during my working hrs. :p but for a few seconds onli. went orchard to mit them aft work. den walk ard de streets to c the xmas lightings n went shaw hse supermarket. was super hungry til i eat ani food dere is for sample. haha. bought a few sushi. n we took bus dwn to vivo. jus anihw walk ard n ate at food republic. had roasted pork noodle since mee soto is sold out. sadden... wanted to eat mee soto. hungry! so i added noodles. n finish up de whole tink. see de nite view for awhile then go home. wed.. half dae. so i actually went bugis to mit my mum and family. walk walk ard b4 gg to buy some new yr goodies. tao kae noi is selling at $1 per small packet and $2 per large packet. cheap!!! de big one is usually $2.95. nw i tink even more ex aldy. haha. so mum sae tt my ears are actually sharp at listening to dis kind of tinks. haha. discounts?! i will noe almost everytink. :D den wen chinatown. walk ard. brought my cousin to tt shop wif super big size clothes. n tt stupid aunty isnt friendly. jus because aft ard 1 hr of tryin, she onli bought one pc. if nt for my cousin, i wuld haf jus haul bad words at her. yar. i SWEAR tt i will nt buy anitink in her shop animore. i jus hope her shop will fold one dae. cab home ard 7. it was drizzling. ... de whole family came while we're having dinner. mum's side one. took a few pics n had alot of nice food. snacks n dinner. n we chat abt drama series til abt 11 b4 my relatives went home. prepare to slp.
went johor on thu. wake up, to dewi's hse n pass her pressie before preparing to go johor. cleared s'pore custom very fast. wifin seconds. s'pore one is actually automated. :) wen out ard 9:30am and reach aun's hse at ard 12. kayy larx. abt 2 hrs. went out for lunch then shopping. too large grp aldy. nt so nice to shop. shld actually go in smaller grp. i wanna go dere n try all other clothes. saw a dress wif bubble bottom. but i didnt actually get to try it. ate tea break n came bac to s'pore. kinda smooth i shld sae. came home n slp. super tired.
kayys. pics time tmr. haha. so long nvr post pics aldy. no time and lazy. muahahah.
wishlist:
1. 2 guess bags tt i saw at OG :
2. baby pink camera :)
3. revamp my bedroom to how i wan it to look like. :)
4. heels. as many as i can have. :)
5. slippers.
6. a dress? tt i saw in johor.
7. a dae at escape...
8. 3 daes at genting!
9. a trip to taiwan!!!
10. strike toto or 4D
我.爱.水.母.头
12:09 |
Sunday, December 21, 2008
im stretched to my limits last wk. really. loads of 'manual' work n less of slp. such tt my body is in a shitty condition. flu for the whole wk plus a bloated stomach ytd nite aft half hr of slp at 1am. n i woke up at 7 plus todae. ... did quite alot of tinks. can sae tt wat nids to be done is done todae.
as of todae, my hair is no longer black n white. i dyed my hair. yup! i finally dyed my hair. :) de dye i bought was pink beige. but de color turn out to b brown. it was okie to me... so long as my hair is colored. :) aniwae, i cant dye bright colors as well.
fell aslp in de aftnoon while waiting for my mum to dye hair for me. it's okie though. im tired aniwae. til my eyes cant open. wrap the presents once i woke up at 5 plus... til 9 plus before im done wif every single one. mum helped me s well. seeing me do very slow. swept the floor and kept my clothes, sew bac de button b4 i online. ...
yeah. once again, i feel stress. stress of work. im scared tmr i will haf to submit another 10 insurance and investments in a dae. it's driving me crazy. n... de worse tink is tt i m nt allowed to make another mistake. i hope tt i wun make mistakes too. but, i m jus another human being on earth. how can i nt make mistakes? tts why im stress. on top of all those submissions, i stil nid to do other tinks. how m i going to find time and finish all my stuff? tell me...
i hope i can survive through another wk. dis wk can sae... i dunno shld sae long or short... it will be tiring. mon n tues... work full dae. tues aft work, may b gg out. i dunno. dunno wat's de plan oso. wed, half dae for me, gg out aft tt as well. thu, might b gg to johor. uncle's hse for shopping? fridae is a norm workin dae. hope it turn out alrite as well. sat... relative's wedding. omg! kill me man! it will b super tiring. but at least, i onli effectively work for 4 daes, includin wed n sat. :)
nxt wk will b de same tink. jus tt 31st, im stayin at home. rather tired.
nxt mth's comin! my bdae's cumin! :) posted a wishlist before. look out for de nxt wish list! :)
我.爱.水.母.头
22:32 |
Saturday, December 20, 2008
nxt mth. isnt worth it k?! but i gt no choice. ... dread workin... spent my whole wk at work todae.
recently, im stretched to my limit. yea. im goin bonkers soon. work n work n more work. super tiring. stil nid to alot of tinks n faster dis period of time. so i will make mistakes here n dere. n de forms are ever changing. each time a form change, i will rite wrongly. so... end up, i wil get scolding. haiz. i tink work is tough. nt suppose to scold vulgar words... i can cos i rarely use them. nt suppose to tink negative... how can i???!!! i m oso a human being. i oso haf my likes and dislikes. i oso haf my own character n tinkin. ... so how can i unless i change myself? if i change myself, i wun b me animore. i will b jus lik ani other person on de street. I WAN TO BE ME! other than i cant sae i dunno, nvr tot abt it, i cant write anitink wrong. if nt, i nid to work OT for each tink tt i do wrong. yeah. as u can guess, im stress to my limit. goin bonkers soon.
my brain is dead since long ago. de tinks tt pple jus tell me, i can forget wifin seconds. im realli tired. ... to de extent tt i dun remb ani single tink.. to the extent tt i can slp wifout eating. i m so stress tt i culden even eat now. nt even my fav ice kacang n noodles. ... where ever i go, i will tink of work. ani trace of surrounding tt resembles my work place, i will tink of work. de best part of all is... i tink of work n dream of work even wen i'm slpin. stress... arent i?
i reali nid to tok, nid to hang out wif frens more, nid to relieve myself from work...
isit reali me? tt cause myself to b lik this? but how can i b more carefree?
kayys. 24, 25, 31 n 1 cumin soon. long wkend? at least slacker work? perhaps not... til jan. im scared tt i cant finish my stuff on time. haiz..
god.. pls bless me. dun let me fill in ani forms wrongly.
cousin is cumin from Malaysia nxt wk. so i tink i will haf a fun wk. at least dun make me so stress. :)
is all de effort worth it aft all?
我.爱.水.母.头
22:34 |
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
breakfast at jurong east market. cos mum went dentist. she saw a pair of shoe tt looks nice. she wanna ask me buy. so i met her dere. ate n walk ard. she bought me a top tt looks nice. omg!!! i can sae i didnt realli lik tt top. buying on impulse is wat i alwaes do recently. can sae tt i buy clothes almost every wkend. it seems lik im wasting alot of money... n buyin new clothes dun haf ani significance animore. ... so went home, watch youtube, love contract!!! kinda nice. but alwaes see ariel lin's 安全裤. so de view... nt so nice. but her acting skills darn good. now... stil tinkin of wat show to watch cos i finish almost every show tt i culd tink of. ... ah!!! cum back. so prepared to go out. wanna go bugis n search for cheap tinks. wen out wif mum. to find my stuff first then temple and shopping!! muaha. n i bought my jumper tt last!!! at $30. i tink it's kinda worth it. better than the clothes at bossini. dun wan sae animore... sadden by de clothes dere. hmmx. kind of prepared for CNY aldy. m tinkin rite now, wat to wear for my bdae. shld i wear de jumper? n buy another dress for CNY. aft tt, went to buy some food. den went chinatown for dinner. duck noodles and fried dumplings. ...
work's tiring as usual. tmr is wed!!! :) PA miting, clean table then lunch. half dae gone lik tt. :) nxt half dae, finish up all submissions and follow up. n... home sweet home. woots! wkend is soon. n nxt wk is X'mas aldy. haha. Merry Xmas to me first for preparing all de presents. i haf exactly 1 wk from todae to prepare every single one.
cousin's coming from Malaysianxt tues!!! i'm so looking forward to it! :D
i m ready to embrace lotsa shopping and food for the whole of nxt wk. :D
我.爱.水.母.头
20:39 |
Saturday, December 13, 2008
tell me how shld a 19 yr old gal look lik? and wat does a 19 yr old gal does.
我.爱.水.母.头
15:05 |
Friday, December 12, 2008
kinda okie wif work. at least can manage most of the tinks. cant reali remb wat i did on tues. wed n thu, my boss is nt in de office. outside for meetings. so for 2 daes, she ask me to go Orchard n mit her. haha. took the chance to go shopping. KINOKUNIYA!!! it's been long since i last wen dere. alot of books changed. there are alot of new bks which i wanted very much. but too bad. if i buy all the mags and bks tt i lik, they will cost a few hundred bucks at least. saddened. so i jus browse tru dere. since i dun haf much time oso. ate takoyaki and the tink tt doraemon loves. culden recall de name all of sudden. so... jus as i guess. over budget this wk. n i dunno where all my money go to. de balance jus dun tally. hmmx. ... okie. try nt to tink too much...
focus!!!
on my coming bdae. wat do i wan. ...
1. money!!! :) more red packets.
wats for new yr???
1. jumper/dress
2. a mature bag
3. heels, heels and more heels!!! :)
mus slim dwn more!!! cos new yr i cfm gain weight de.
haiz... thnks to de economic dwnturn tt i cant do anitink. ... i can onli dream.
jus found out todae tt desmond and my bro is in de same lion dance troupe. wen to c my bro practice lion dance todae. so happen tt des saw me n he said hi to me first. hmmx. didnt expect tt. it's lik de las time we met was wif de gals. yea. de des tt im tokin abt is des from my sec sch. ...
我.爱.水.母.头
22:50 |
Monday, December 08, 2008
suddenly, i feel more relieve todae. ... n i understand sometink...
SPARE MYSELF FROM AGONY AND I WILL BE HAPPIER!!!
yup. bin reflecting on myself why does everyone land in the same situation but the onli diff is tt dey can b happy while im nt? thus, i decided to nt worry abt anitink. at least im tryin hard.
de past 3 daes can sae tt it's super tiring for me. dunno why. but i feel tired. it's supposed to be rest daes and public hol but i tink abt work almost everywhere i go. my onli wish nw is to reali relax myself. nt even a single second of work. isit bcos of work tt i feel tired?
at least i tried... spare me from agony pls.
我.爱.水.母.头
20:41 |
Sunday, December 07, 2008
today went ard singapore. ...
woke up at 7 plus aft 8 hrs of slpin. stil tired though. but i decided to listen to songs then go jogging. more than 7 rounds plus walkin to and fro park in 45 mins. pro? nt really though... haha. so i jus pack n get ready to go out. wore pink mickey mouse shirt, black denim skirt, silver mickey mouse necklace and pink shoe tt i bought it 2 yrs ago but wore onli twice or thrice. muaha. wanted to chng to black miceky mouse earrings but my ears are too pain to do anitink to it. gt out of the hse at 10 plus. send bro off to west coast cc for his lion dance...
went tiong bahru mkt for breakfast? it's lik 11 plus wen i eat. reach ard 11 n walk ard to see clothes. queued up for de noodle stall. omg! to tink u can find $2 nice food nowadays?! i jus wanna eat tt stall wifout reali looking at de price of the food. so i onli noe de price wen i was queueing. aft 40 mins of waiting, gt my mum wanton noodles and myself chicken feet noodles. tt's de nicest chicken feet tt i've ever eaten. the portion is kinda big as well. such tt i feel full aft eatin a lil more than half. if u haf time and patience, it's worth queueing. if nt.. so.. to me, de price, quantity and quality is excellent i shld sae. but... de waiting time is horrible. 40 mins for de food, isit worth it? i dun tink so. dere are many other nice food dere but all long queue. sundae, wif super packed carparks and roads, food centre is empty but nice food queues are horribly long... ... wkdays, nt so pack carparks, but crowded food centres, queues for nice food are actually shorter. isnt it ironic? or isit tt pple settle for the nt so nice food on wkdaes n nicer food during wkends? reminds me of my times in SNEC. wkly wed lunch wif julia, portia and ivan at tiong bahru mkt. fried ckn wing wif a bowl of noodles, grassjelly drink in a nice cup, buy alot of finger food back to office n eat. ... i miz those times. how i wish time can turn bac.. had ice cream ice kacang for dessert aft meal, bought some fried dim sum den off to chinatown shopping. nt a reali pleasent and enjoyable meal time. ..
bought some stuff at pple park complex.
isnt this nice? pink beige. :)
muaha! my hair dye. ... dun haf de color i wan. so no choice got to take dis. ..
aft walkin a few shops b4 i finally decide on this. the shop kiper is nice enuff to intro me a better one. but can onli sustain 8 washes. he sae tt brand dun haf chemicals so e color last long but will nt damage my hair. wanted tt initially. but i wan RED!!! too bad dere's no dis color. so he say de brighter the color, the more damaging it is to de hair. so de one wifout chemical dun haf light color. so he intro me another one. wif a bit of chemical. oso dun haf de color i wan. so he sae dis is de brightest color tt he haf. refering to de one i bought. specially designed for teens. :) so i decided to buy dis. isnt the box nice? haha. but he sae tt my hair is black. so it doesnt realli matter wat color i dye. wont haf de effect unless i bleach my hair which my mum dun allow. nvm. shall try dis first. hope tt my hair wil nt b spoilt by e chemicals... walk ard to c clothes and shoes. bought a pair of black toe socks. n off we go. to geylang to c my bro perform. haha. he looks stunned wen we went to find him.
dwn to aljunied, my cousin's hse to c my young cousin. 4 mths old. born on 08/08/08. omg! super cute! n he actually smiled at me many times. muaha. mayb im wearing pink todae? n he liks bright colors? de other 2 yr old cousin kip askin me to open all the cereal for him to eat. omg! n he can actually eat 1 n half containers of it. ate 2 of his honey stars. remind me of dewi suddenly. dewi and her honey stars. "m i good todae, teacher?" --> i alwaes sae dis wen i wan to eat 2 or more of her honey stars tt stick tgt. haha. twist 2 dunno-look-lik-wich-animal balloons for him. haha. n off we go. to punggol to visit my uncle. bought a bottle of meiji choco at $1.60. super nice. :)
his frens were dere wen we reached. so tok for awhile. stayed for half hr den we leave. i dunno wat to sae to him. he smiled wen i say i m dere to c him. n he wanna wave to me wen i say i wan to leave. he onli wave to me and my bro. hope he reali get well soon. i feel tt i realli mus salute all de care givers from all over the world. such a tough n stressful job n dey are able to handle it well. de environment is so.. o0h man! jus a half hr dere n i aldy cant take it. imagine those working dere... suddenly i feel tt dey are the best pple in de world. chuan linn!!! wat do i wanna do in future? walked ard IMH aft tt. to familiarise wif de place jus incase i nid to go. hw cum i kip tinkin of work everywhere i go???
to compass point! by de time we reach, it's aldy 6. dad suggest to eat first. i dun realli feel hungry. cos i had a super filing breakfast of noodles and ice kacang. made a kopitiam card. i nid to clock $6.50 more to upgrade to a blue card in order to get discount. hmmx. shld b able to. had chicken chop hor fun and ice kacang again. hahah. mum wanted to eat red bean milk ice but dad bought ice kacang. it okie. i love anitink tt's cold. :D walked ard aft tt. lookin for christmas gift. i noe wat i wanna gif. but.. cant find. finally found them at precious moments shop. shlden reveal til christmas eve. :) i haven even start preparing for christmas! my tian! i hope i can get my tinks on time.
bought my new pair of sandals from BATA. dunno why i buy wen i dun reali nid it. regret wasting money. yup! now isnt de time to waste money. jus get wat i nid. stick to my plan! stick to my plan! mum initially wanted me to get another pair of shoes for work. she sae dun kip wearin the same pair. so i shld wear dis pair to work sometimes. but i dun reali lik to kip chngin shoes. ..
dad drive us ard wif his lorry. wanted to go orchard but decided nt to seeing the stupid jam dere. chng destination instead. but mum n i dun wanna walk animore. we're tired. so we came home. bought newspper on de wae. was so thirsty tt i culden take it so bought a can of drink. dunno why. but i wanted a root beer. drank abt half can den throw awae. cant let mum know. muaha. too bad. de shop tt i wanted to go didnt open. bel! help me c!
kayys. too tired. wanna slp liaoz. tmrl nid to exercise more due to de stupid intake of one million calories from all the unhealthy food todae. nitenite! :)
我.爱.水.母.头
22:10 |
Saturday, December 06, 2008
kayys. seems lik my nitrogen tank is filling up. :) when wil it b 100%?
i m alot happier now. as compared to jus daes ago? yup. i dunno why. it feelx good to b happie. arent it good if u can do onli the tinks tt u want to do? sometimes i m stil wondering wat do i realli wan. isit possible to study full time and part time at the same time?
listen to a few songs last nite. gu dan bei ban qiu is one of the songs tt i listened to. recently, i kip listening to the ariel lin version aft 5-6 yrs of nt listening. was used to her version. dunno why i jus few lik listening to ocean's version n make a comparison. haha. n i realise tt i m nt used to his version at all, the once familiar song is unfamiliar to me rite now... but i stil enjoy it. muaha.
piaing - campus shrewd, 不良笑花, now.watched til ep 9 aldy. 4 more to go. i tink i can finish watching by tmr. til now, i onli lik ep 8. de rest of the ep are boring to me. i dun find the show farni at all. omg! is dere ani show wich can make me laugh lik mad from the first ep to last ep?
was busy wif sometinks last nite. de stupid fan is clogged wif dust such tt i cant use it. de moment i turn it on, de dust fly all over the room. lazy to clean it, so i used SCENTED wet tissue to wipe. n my hands turn black de moment i start cleaning. used 3 pcs. de room smell lik insecticide for the whole nite aft tt. ... kill me pls. insecticide. muaha. lucky de air con tt i turn on aft tt help to 'absorb' abit of the smell.
woke up at 7:40 wen i slpt ard 1:30 laz nite. super tired. wanted to slp sumore but nid to settle some hse work. mum's workin. so have to catch her b4 she leave the hse. yea. n i went bac to slp. thnks to de songs tt my bro on. darn loud. so i turn on my songs too. haha. n de whole hse is super noisy. wait til 9 plus den go jogging. close my eyes truout. n managed to jog 2.5 rounds wifout knocking onto anitink. so i decided to open my eyes and walk for another 4 rounds. bought lunch n 1 pc of roti prata. had roti prata and fish crackers den start wif hsework. washed my fan, shoe and slippers finally. den cook lunch. curry spaghetti wif yong tau foo. haha. wat weird fusion cuisine is tt. but i find it nice. i shall cook somemore tinks on sat. mus noe how to cook. cooking is fun. :) feel lik doin fish and chips and chicken chop for dinner sometime ltr... :) cooking jus rocks. plan plan plan!!!
12 more daes to countdwn to my bdae. haha. but i dun look forward to it. turning 20 soon.
my to-do-list:
1. Finish watching miss no good
2. Pack all my fotos back to where they belong
3. Finish watchin love contract
4. Start watchin corner with love.
5. Pack newsppers.
6. Clear storybooks.
hmmx. let's see how much i can accomplish by monday. my guess: none! haha.
我.爱.水.母.头
12:33 |
Friday, December 05, 2008
mood super bad. its hard to kip up wif everytink in life. everytime wen u are satisfied, look bac, n u will realise u lose alot more than u gain. tts how i feel rite now. i guess dun haf mus choice in life. it's all predestined. nadaa. dun wanna blog animore. im super tired now but wif tonnes of tinks to do before i can slp ltr.
我.爱.水.母.头
23:20 |